Posted on March 18, 2020 by Jenna Elise on Jenna Elise Blog
Hi, I’m Jenna, a recovering perfectionist. To be clear, I haven’t always been a perfectionist about everything, but this annoying trait still presents itself from time to time; I think mostly in situations where I’m fearful of something going wrong. However, the more I expose myself to uncomfortable situations the less persistent my ‘perfectionism’ is.
Maybe you can relate. Think about that first big meal you got to host. The frantic preparation and attempt to get everything just right. The OCD house cleaning, the excessive amount of food, the freshly washed bedding (even though nobody plans on staying the night), and the sudden need to hang stuff on the walls. These are just a few of the things you may have done.
And of course people want to help you with everything, amidst your world of chaos! And as much as you love and appreciate the sentiment, the thought makes you cringe inside. Now you have to delegate and you don’t know where to start. Or there’s a chance they may not care the same and say “it’s good enough”. So in the end, you’re bitter and back to doing it all alone anyway. (If you have ever been one of those people to be shunned away from helping, we’re sorry and keep reading!).
The big day comes and goes, and now you’re suffering from “the perfectionist hangover”. But hey, at least the house is clean! Now it is the accumulation of these ‘hangovers’ that has caused my perfectionism to subside. As I sit and ponder the events of the night before, I always come to the same conclusion – it all turned out okay. Even if the meat was over cooked and the bathroom mirror wasn’t cleaned. Even if this supper was planned months ahead or the night before, it always ends up the same. People enjoy the company, and even the flaws too. Because it is in those flaws that we see each other as human.
When I started this blog I felt myself beginning to over plan, overthink, and over critique. Insert thoughts here:
“But Jenna, you can’t get pictures done! Your hair hasn’t been done in months, you don’t have lash extensions, and you’re still not at that goal weight. PLUS, you didn’t even buy a new wardrobe for it!”. (Like others will be able to notice anyways…)
“JENNA! Starting a blog?! Seriously, you better wait until you learn EVERYTHING. Map the entire thing out, buy a new laptop, get the office completely organized.” (Because these are all essential to your success…)
“You want to have guests over?!?! But the window casing still isn’t up, you haven’t reorganized your decorative shelves, and the inside of the fridge is a mess.” (Honestly, do your friends and family really care about that?)
For once, I jumped right in. It may flop, but that’s okay because at least I DID SOMETHING. And the more I embrace my flaws, I see that perfectionism is a waste of time. STOP WAITING FOR PERFECT. Host the dinner, even if the house isn’t clean. Start that new business, even if you don’t know everything. Take the pictures, even if your physique isn’t what you want it to be yet. Stop waiting for perfect, because you’ll miss out on a lot of fun.
And honestly, perfect just may never come.
- Jenna
Images by May Jay Photography
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